Taking Things Slow
by Rointheta
Summary: The Doctor and Rose visit Jackie after the events in Canary Wharf and realise they have very different views of the nature of their relationship. Jackie POV and lazy Doomsday fix.


Unbeta'd slightly cracky, very silly fic.

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Jackie Tyler saved the world today. Her daughter and that bleeding alien she insists on spending her life with stopped by for a visit earlier and, as soon as they saw the ghost of Jackie's old dad, the Doctor claimed something evil was afoot. Well, all right, this time he was correct, she'll give him that but, she supposes, every dog has its day.

First the Doctor abducted Jackie in that blue box of his and then they were all kidnapped by some evil organisation. After that she met a parallel version of her dead husband and then the Doctor prattled on about...something. Oh, and he had 3D glasses on, for some reason. She didn't really pay attention, to be honest. There was some talk about Rose and Jackie jumping to a parallel universe, of all things, but Rose firmly put her foot down and refused. So, as it happened, Jackie, Rose and the Doctor stayed where they were and the rest of those parallel people and Mickey went back to their world. The Doctor punched something into a computer, secured himself and Rose to a clamp of some sort and then Jackie pulled levers and saved the entire world. Probably the universe, actually! At least that's what she's going to tell Bev.

Now, Jackie is in her kitchen, putting on a kettle of tea since Rose and the Doctor are to come back any minute. They're moving the TARDIS-or so they claim. Jackie is fairly certain she knows in just what way they are making the TARDIS move... She reckons that must be a thing, though, shagging after nearly being sucked into a void, celebrating being alive. She wouldn't mind some celebrating on her own, but... Well...

The sound of the front door being opened brings her out of her musings, so she pours hot water into three cups, grabs some scones and then sets the table.

"Mum, it's us," her daughter calls out.

"In here, sweetheart!"

Rose and the Doctor walk into the kitchen and sit down and, to Jackie's big surprise, they're still wearing the same clothes as they were earlier. It didn't take long for them to come back either, come to think of it. In moments such as these, Jackie can't help but wonder if she's wrong about them after all. She remembers how it was those early days with Pete; they could barely keep their hands off each other, for goodness' sake! So, why are these two sitting here with her and having a cuppa?

"How does it feel, mum, being a hero?" Rose asks, big grin on her face and looking proud.

"Suppose it feels rather good, doesn't it?" Jackie replies and sits down, stirring her tea with a spoon as she ponders today's events. "Although...a bit hectic for my taste. S'lot of running involved, innit? All those stairs... Blimey! Thought my legs would fall off."

"And how..." Rose worries her lip, fidgeting with her earring. "How...I mean, you met dad again. How are you... Are you all right?"

Jackie dismisses Rose's concern for her well-being by waving her hand. "Oh, that wasn't _my_ Pete, sweetheart. My Pete's long gone. Besides, we would never work. Posh man like him? Probably used to getting his way and always being the center of attention. Oh, I don't have time for that! Got a life of my own, I do. Tomorrow it's bingo night, on Wednesday I'm seeing that film... You know, with that handsome bloke? You know the one with the hair and the beard?" She gestures around her head, looking at Rose.

"Huh?"

"Oh, you know. Him! That bloke! The one in that other film. With the ginger lady. Oh, he's so handsome, he is."

"Who?"

She shakes her head at Rose. "Oh, why do I even bother talking to you about things like that? Never know anything that goes on on Earth anymore, do you?" She sighs. "Anyway...on Friday I'm going to the pub and on Saturday there's the christening for- No. Name ceremony, they called it. Apparently they're too alternative for church," she says, rolling her eyes. "And then-"

"Who's having a name ceremony?"

"Oh, you don't know? I swear, Rose. You're hopeless, you are! Your cousin Abby and her bloke. They sent out the invitations weeks ago!"

Rose shakes her head, holding out her hands in exasperation. "And how would I have gotten that invitation, mum, huh?"

"You're telling me you've got everything you could ever dream of in that thing, but you don't have a postbox?"

Rose snorts. "Are you daft? What address did you give her, then? Rose Tyler, the TARDIS, the time vortex, the universe?"

"Actually," the Doctor says, holding his finger up in the air. "The time vortex exists in its own dimension and isn't a part of this universe."

"Whatever." Rose sighs and then turns back to Jackie. "I didn't get the invite, all right?"

"But are you coming? Oh, Rose please say you're coming. S'been so long since you came to any family gatherings. They've never even met the Doctor. How long's it been for you two? Two years? About bloody time, I reckon. It's this Saturday, one o'clock at Abby's house."

"Uhm..." Rose shoots the Doctor a quick glance. "Don't think we're staying that long mum."

"We could always come back," says the Doctor. "Or skip ahead."

"What?"

"Weeell, your mum did save the day, didn't she? The least we can do." He shrugs and stuffs an entire scone into his mouth, happily chewing it without seeming the least bit bothered by Rose gaping at him.

"You want to go to a family function with me?"

"_Want_ might not be the correct word, but I don't mind."

"What? Why?"

Jackie kick's Rose's shin under the table. "Shh. Don't ruin it," she whispers to her. "Lovely!" she says, smiling at the Doctor. "It's Harry Potter themed, so the gift has to be something wizard-like. They're... Oh, what did they call it?"

"Potterheads!" says the Doctor.

"That's right! Potterheads. They're naming the baby..." She knits her brow, scratching her chin as she thinks. "Sirius? Yes, Sirius James Al-Albert?"

"Albus?" the Doctor says.

Jackie nods. "Yeah, yeah. Albus! You like Harry Potter, then?"

"Like? _Like_?! Oh, it's brilliant, it is! I've always liked Albus for a little boy. Albus Tyler. Sounds good, don't you reckon?" he says, looking at Rose.

She clears her throat. "Sorry? Albus _Tyler_?"

"Well, I don't have a last name, do I?"

"So, you're taking mine?" Rose takes a sip of her tea, peering curiously at him over the rim of her cup, eyebrows raised.

He laughs. "No, Rose. Our son would take yours. Why would I need a last name?"

Rose nearly chokes on her tea and starts coughing, so Jackie helpfully pats her on the back.

"Our-our son?"

"Well, or our daughter, then. But I don't know about Albus for a little girl." He makes a face, thinking. "Suppose it could work..."

"I didn't know you were talking about having children," Jackie says to Rose. "Why didn't you tell me? And don't name your daughter Albus. Or Hermione. Poor thing would never hear the end of it."

"Oh, you've read Harry Potter?" the Doctor asks, beaming.

"Me? Nah. Saw the first two films, I did. Don't much remember the names, though, but I reckon there must be some proper girls names, yeah?"

"Weeeell, there's Molly, Lily, Rita, Sybill-"

"Lily's lovely!" Jackie says and looks to Rose for her opinion, but she's just staring at them, slack-jawed and with half eaten scone in her hand.

"A bit unimaginative, innit? With another flower name, I mean," the Doctor says.

"Suppose... How about Molly for a little girl, then?"

The Doctor nods thoughtfully. "Hm, I quite like it. Anyone would be proud being named after Molly Weasley. Brilliant woman! Wouldn't you say, Rose?"

Rose closes her eyes for a moment, brow furrowed. She puts down her teacup on the table, stands up and goes to the sink where she fills up a glass of water, drinking it all up in one go. She leans against the counter, catching her breath, and returns to the table.

"I'm sorry." She laughs as she sits down. "I thought you just said... " She chuckles some more. "I must be tired. I thought you just said _our_ son. As in yours and mine."

"Yes, of course. Who else would I be having children with?"

"Uhm... Wha'?" Rose shakes her head, looking utterly confused. "You want kids?"

"Well, I am the last of my kind, so... Obviously not now, since you're not ready, but in the future. Don't you-don't you want children?"

Rose sits frozen for several seconds, mouth hanging open and eyes locked at the Doctor, but then she leans back in her chair and says: "I, uhm... What?"

"Don't you want children?" he asks, enunciating every word clearly and giving her a you-silly-little-ape look.

"Well, yeah, but... I mean, I suppose? Never really..." She leans over the table, smiling gently and looking concernedly into his eyes. "Doctor, you do know that you have to shag to make babies, yeah?"

"Well, that's not true, Rose. It depends entirely on the species and, well, what help science can provide but, yes, I do know that," he says, tone a tad condescending.

"...and that you would have to shag _me_, unless you're planning on borrowing mum's turkey baster?" She lets out a nervous laugh.

He scrunches up his face. "Ew, no ta."

"Ah, so turkey baster it is," Rose says, leaning back again. "And thanks for the 'ew'. Really appreciate it."

"What? No! No baster! We would _of course_ conceive a child in the old-fashioned way! Why would I want to use a baster?"

"Are you telling me you're-you're _attracted_ to me?"

"Why would I be with you if I weren't?" he asks, voice high pitched and hands held out, palms up.

"Be with... As in..." She narrows her eyes. "Be with in what way, exactly?"

"I mean be with me as in..." He gestures between them. "Well, we've never really talked about, er, labels, have we? Think I'm a bit too old to be anyone's boyfriend and significant other sounds boring. Eugh. There's partner, but that could mean anything, really. Very vague, that. Then there's lover... Well, we're technically not lovers yet," he says, and Jackie nearly drops her scone in her lap. They're not? What the...?

"Hm..." he continues, running his hand over his jaw. "We've been married on several planets, though, so husband and wife? Too pretentious? Nah, covers it pretty nicely, hm? You're human. You should like that."

"What?" Rose breathes out, barely audibly.

"You're _married_?!" Jackie shouts, glaring at Rose as she gives her a smack on the arm. "You got married without me? My only daughter, married, and I wasn't even invited?"

"I'm not married!" Rose says, cheeks burning pink, eyes round and big as saucers. "What's happening right now?" she whispers.

"Well, they've not been real weddings, per se. We've done it five times and always because it was either that or execution. Some planets have very strict rules on public displays of affection and we're quite the hand-holders, Rose and I."

Rose scratches her head, eyes flitting between her mum and the Doctor. "What's happening? Did I eat something weird? Or-or did I inhale some sort of alien pollen? Is this real?" She pinches her arm. "Ow!" She bores her eyes into first the Doctor's and then Jackie's. "Are you having a laugh? Did you plan this together to make fun of me?"

"What? Why would we do that?"

"Are you all right, sweetheart?" Jackie asks, patting Rose on the hand.

"No! What's going on?" Rose asks the Doctor. "You-you want babies? I'm your wife? We've never even kissed, Doctor, and now you want me to give you _babies_?!"

Jackie gasps. "You've never even kissed? But you've been together for ages!" She turns to the Doctor and gives him a solid whack on the arm. "Why are you not snogging my daughter?"

"We're taking things slow," the Doctor says at the same time as Rose says, "We're not together!"

"What?!" they say simultaneously.

Rose points at him. "What do you mean we're talking things slow?"

"What do you mean we're not together?" he says, looking very affronted. "Did I do something wrong? Are you upset with me? Is this some sort of silly human punishment I don't know about?"

"What?! Since when are we together? In what way? What's even happening right now?! I-I-I... What?! When?!"

"Well, you were with Mickey when we met but, honestly, you chose me over him, so one could argue that it started then. And why anyone would want to be with Mickey when they have me, I can't even begin to fathom! But you didn't seem ready to let go, so I waited for you to dump the idiot, which you did in Cardiff. Or did he dump you? I was never really clear on that. Well, no matter. Since then, that's when. Oh! It rhymed!" he says and makes a happy sound in the back of his throat.

Rose expels a breath rather loudly. "Cardiff?! _Cardiff!?_ And when were you planning on telling me this?"

"I thought you knew!"

"How would I know if you didn't tell me?"

"Well, it's rather obvious isn't it? Didn't think you needed me to spell it out for you! What? Do I have to slip you a note, asking you if you want to go steady?" He rolls his eyes and snorts.

"What?!"

The Doctor holds up his hands, counting along on his fingers as he says: "We always hold hands; we hug at least ten times per day; we cuddle on the sofa every night; I always sleep in your bed; we flirt all the time; everyone always assumes we're a couple and we never contradict them, since we _are_ a couple," he says and gives her a pointed look. "Need I go on? Why would we do all those coupley things if we weren't a couple?! Or do you do those things with anyone?" he asks, looking horrified.

"No, of course not. But-but... Couples kiss and shag!" she says, pointing at him.

He blushes and runs his fingers through his hair. "Yes, but I'm waiting for you to be ready. Very patiently at that, I'd like to point out," he says, turning to Jackie. "I've not pressured your daughter in any way. No need for slaps!"

Rose puts her hands on the table, leaning over it. "_You _are waiting for _me_?"

"Yes! I thought it was going rather well and that we were moving in the right direction, but then I regenerated and... Well, I know having sex with an alien can be...well...ehm. As you know, my-" He quickly shuts up and turns to Jackie. "Do you mind?"

"Not at all. Go on," Jackie says, motioning him to do so by waving her hand.

"I meant: do you mind?" he repeats, tone a bit curt, nodding at the kitchen door.

Jackie sighs. "Oh, all right."

She gets up and walks into the living room but, since this isn't the first time she's had to spy a little on Rose and her blokes, she knows just where to stand to be able to see and hear what's going on through the serving hatch.

"You were saying?" says Rose.

The Doctor clears his throat as he adjusts his tie. "Sex with an alien can be...different. My bits are not exactly what you are used to, as you know."

"What? I don't know that! Why would I know that?"

"But...you changed my clothes on Christmas and I never wear pants!"

Rose blushes. "Yeah, I noticed , but it was before I saw any...bits, so I closed my eyes and kept them closed, all right? Didn't want to take advantage."

He chuckles, soft look in his eye. "Oh, Rose... Well, my... Well, it's a little different from what you're used to, but nothing alarming," he hurriedly clarifies. "So, I assumed that you might have been, er...hesitant since it's not exactly..." He gestures vaguely and Jackie would, sure as hell, pay good money to know what's going on in his trousers. "So, I've waited for you to, I suppose, wrap your head around it. The-the physical aspect of our relationship, I mean, not-not..." He looks down at his crotch, looking slightly flushed. "I meant, getting used to the thought of being intimate with someone from another planet! And there have been a few times when I thought that... Well, after Krop Tor, for one, but you just gave me a peck on the cheek and fell asleep! And today! After all of that! Cybermen and Daleks and almost going to another universe and declaring you'll never leave me and...! But no, not you. Not Rose Tyler. You're still not ready. How long's it gonna take anyway?" he asks, bottom lip protruding.

Rose shakes her head as though to clear it from confusion, holding up her hands. "Hold on. You're telling me that you've been ready to shag me for over a year now?"

He gets a sheepish expression on his face. "Ehm. Yes."

She crosses her arms over her chest, giving him a look full of Tyler attitude. "Really. You-the Doctor-shagging _me_."

"Yes!" he says, throwing his arms out in frustration.

"Wait... Just-just, hold on. So...you're in-you're in love with me?" she says, looking and sounding as though she expects someone to run in any minute, now, and tell her this is all a big joke.

He shifts in his seat. "Well, that's usually how these things work. Are you..." His Adam's apple bobs and he shrinks back a little. "Are you telling me you're not? With-with me."

Rose blinks at him couple of times, but then her face breaks out in a smile, tongue poking out between her teeth. She hurls herself off her chair and climbs up in the Doctor's lap, snogging him senseless whilst running her fingers through his hair. His arms flail about for a couple of seconds before he wraps them around her body, pulling her closer. Rose moans and grinds against him, so Jackie looks the other way until she hears her daughter release the Doctor with a loud 'mwah'.

Sneaking a peek through the serving hatch again, Jackie sees a grinning Time Lord who looks dafter than ever: his specs hang askew on the bridge of his nose; his bottom lip is pouty and wet; his eyes are glazed over and his already ridiculous hair is even more so, all mussed up and pointing in every direction.

Rose slides off his lap and grabs his tie, pulling him with her as she stalks out of the flat.

"Sorry, mum. Got a Time Lord to shag," she calls over her shoulder. "See ya later, yeah?"

"Have fun, sweetheart," Jackie calls back and then walks out to the kitchen. "About bloody time," she mutters to herself as she sits down to finish her cuppa.

* * *

_fin_


End file.
